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Before You Lose Yourself in Another Relationship, Read This.
“Time apart is healthy. It allows me to miss you more.”
We had just spent the last 3 days together. Uninterrupted. And when his friends called him to hang out and mine did the same, we got dressed together, brushed our teeth in the same sink and went about our separate ways.
I’ve never spent this much time with someone. Even when I lived with an old partner, we didn’t spend this much time together. And yet, I lost myself. I lost who I was because I was busy trying to keep him happy.
Even though he wasn’t there half the time, a lot of my very best friends are of the opposite gender, so he didn’t like me hanging out with them. He needed a lot of reassurance in me staying home and he needed a lot of coddling with things like laundry, meal prepping, things people normally do for themselves.
So I became a work-a-holic and a stay at home girlfriend. It’s what I knew and instantly became a part of my identity. Except I also had to work two jobs because my income went to mostly supporting him financially and making sure he had a variety groceries for the week, when I’ve lived off of salmon, rice, and sesame buns since I was 13.
Now all of this made my identity his. I was doing things for him, and not for me. And when my male friend called me to ask…
